My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. [Psalm 121:1b-2]
Blessed are those who keep His testimonies,
Who seek Him with the whole heart!
The also do no iniquity;
They walk in His ways.
You have commanded us
To keep your precepts diligently.
[Psalm 119:2-4]
I sit. I read. I pray. I type. I pray. I delete. I pray. I type some more. I process.
Sometimes my days blend together. Each day repeats the day before. Other days I blink and a month has disappeared. Babies grow. Children learn. Messes are cleaned. The clean gets messy. Days are mixed with the practicality of living; of feeding, washing, growing, exploring, instructing, disciplining, learning, seeking and the call to be still. I'm called to seek Him with my whole heart. I'm called to know that He is God.
People say I'm super mom. People look at me and the babes He's entrusted to my care; they look with wonder and awe. And I wonder back just how I can give all the glory to Him. The good they see is not me. There is still so much I struggle in my flesh. {but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, because it is written, "Be holy, for I am holy."}[1 Peter 1:15-16] Still so far away. He still has so much work to do on me.
He is working on me.
He is asking questions of my actions. And questions of my heart.
I can hide from others, but not from Him.
And the fact is, that my actions reveal my heart. And so, as I look at the things that I do, say, wear, buy, invest in, spend time on, take pleasure in.....I must evaluate my heart.
And I seek and plead and ask God to show me what it looks like. And when the answer returns that it may....no that it WILL look differently for different people, I am left more confused than before.
But He is my help. He is MY HELP. He made heaven and earth....and He is my help.
So when I wake up, I will thank Him. When I dress, I will ask Him to show me HIS ways. He will help me. As I care for my littles, I will run to Him for help.
And I will pray that as I love Him and as He helps me, that others will see HIM and not me.
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Thursday, April 26, 2012
The Birth Story of Brinley Elizabeth
My pregnancy with Brinley went smoothly and similarly to my first three pregnancies. I felt good for most of the pregnancy, but knew that she was going to be a healthy-sized baby and was hopeful that she’d be early like my other babies. My singleton pregnancies seem to follow a trend of my uterus measuring “big” at the end of pregnancy, my doctor ordering a growth ultrasound in the third trimester where the baby measures on the bigger side, and my doctor making the decision to strip my membranes (if I want her to) during my 37 weeks appointment. With Kenzie, this appointment landed at 37 weeks 6 days. My water broke shortly after my appointment and I had her the next day at 2:32pm. With Ryken, this appointment landed at 37 weeks 3 days and I went into labor that evening and had him the next morning at 7:32am.
As my pregnancy with Brinley unfolded, it followed the pattern I’d come to expect. At 32 weeks, I was measuring correctly. By 34.5 weeks I was measuring closer to 37 weeks and my doctor ordered the growth ultrasound. I went for the ultrasound a week later, when I was 35 weeks 4 days pregnant with Bri and she was estimated to be 7lbs 5oz. The other thing causing me to measure on the large side was excessive amounts of amniotic fluid. The fluid surrounding Brinley was about twice the “normal” amount of fluid.
Between Brinley’s size and the extra fluid, I was getting very uncomfortable and taking care of the house and kids was getting harder. Thankfully, I was still sleeping well at night and since I was carrying Brinley high, I only was waking up once in the night to use the bathroom at the most…sometimes I was able to sleep through without using the bathroom.
By my 36 week (I was 36 weeks 5 days) appointment which was on Thursday March 8th, my doctor had decided that she wanted to start non-stress tests twice a week starting the next week. She wanted me to come on Mondays and Thursdays. I made my appointment for Monday, March 12th. She told me that if I wanted her to strip my membranes that day, she would do that for me, and that she would like to try to get things going.
Over the weekend, we had to decide if I would have my doctor strip my membranes. I desperately WANTED Brinley OUT, but there were some things that made the decision somewhat hard. The biggest thing was Chip’s work schedule. On Monday and Tuesday, March 12th and 13th most of the managers and shift leads that work with Chip were out of town. I also had a dinner planned with two of my friends on the evening of March 12th. I didn’t want to miss it : ) But I really wanted her out. Chip decided that work would be ok without him on Monday and Tuesday if I were to go into labor and I decided that I would just have the doctor go ahead and strip me and we’d see what happened. I was trying not to get my hopes up too much and remember that “each pregnancy/labor/delivery can be different”.
Monday, March 12th
8:30am Chip left for work and I got ready for my appointment.
10:15am His mom came over to watch the kids and my Aunt Ruth who played the part of my “doula” came over to take me to my appointment.
11:00am We got to my appointment and waited for awhile until the machine was available for the non-stress test. I got hooked up and they monitored Brinley for about 20 minutes. She looked great. We moved into an exam room and my doctor checked me. My cervix was harder to reach than previous weeks and I was still only around 30% effaced and 2-3cm dilated. My doctor stripped my membranes and said she’d come back in around 10 minutes to do them one more time, which she did.
12:30pm We left the office and my aunt dropped me off at home. I asked my mother-in-law if she would come back over later that night when I got home from dinner so that Chip and I could go for a walk. I felt no different than before the appointment and was preparing myself mentally that I’d probably still be pregnant and would be going to my next appointment that Thursday. I was excited that I had the dinner plans with friends because it gave me something exciting to look forward to since nothing seemed to be happening baby-wise.
Around late afternoon, I had a few very sporadic, spread out contractions which weren’t really any different than other contractions I’d been having. I sent text messages to my friends that dinner was still on, telling one of them that it would be perfect if we could go out to dinner and then I could go into labor after that, but I wasn’t planning on it.
6:30pm I called my mom on the way to dinner. I told her that I’d had some contractions but nothing significant and we talked about how I had been so discouraged the whole day that I had my membranes stripped with Ryken too, thinking nothing would happen. Remembering that gave me a little bit of hope that something may still happen, but I was still trying to mentally prepare myself to be pregnant for awhile longer.
6:45pm I got to Pei Wei and was walking from my car to the restaurant and had a contraction that was a little bit stronger and lasted a little bit longer, but still nothing that made me very excited. At this point, I must have started having contractions every 15-20 minutes that were getting much more noticeable. I remember having one while I was outside sitting on a bench talking to my friend Jamie waiting for Melissa to get there. I had 2 more while we waited in the long line. I had another one or two while we ate and another one when we walked down to Paradise Bakery to get cookies. By that point, I was a little bit more excited, especially since Chip’s mom was coming so we could go for a walk. I was starting to get hopeful that the walk might really get things going.
8:50pm I got home and Chip’s mom was there, so we headed out on a walk around the neighborhood. Almost right away, the contractions started coming regularly…around every 3 minutes. They were lasting around 35-45 seconds. As we walked further some of them got stronger and lasted longer, others stayed shorter. They were anywhere from 2 minutes apart lasting a full minute to 4 minutes apart lasting 40 seconds. We had been walking for around 15-20 minutes and decided to head back so I could use the bathroom. I also wanted to rest for awhile to see if the contractions stayed consistent or went away.
9:12pm On our way back, I called my mom and told her that things were starting to look pretty promising for that night. She decided she’d still wait until morning to drive up.
9:25pm We got back from our walk and I went to the bathroom and was having some bloody show.
9:30pm I called my aunt to tell her what was going on. I decided I’d rest for awhile and then go for another walk and I would call her if/when we decided to go to the hospital based on how things were going. Chip decided to take a shower and was updating his MP3 player. As I sat around, contractions continued to come, although a little bit further apart, maybe every 5-6 minutes. Whenever I was up, they were stronger and closer, but when I sat down they stayed strong enough that I knew things were still happening.
9:40pm I called my sister-in-law, Liz, to let her know what was going on. Chip’s dad dropped some stuff off for Chip’s mom since it was looking like she’d be staying over night with the kids and we finished packing up for the hospital.
10:30pm We decided that we’d put our bags in the car and take another walk. With my labor with Ryken and my labor with the twins, I had to walk A LOT at the hospital. I wanted to walk outside in the nice weather as long as possible.
We put everything in the car and started out on our second walk. We got about 50ft from our condo complex when I told Chip we better turn around and just go to the hospital. The contractions were getting significantly stronger and I didn’t want to get into the neighborhood and not be able to walk back.
10:42pm I called Aunt Ruth to tell her we were in the car headed to the hospital and that she could come whenever she wanted to. I got to labor and delivery and checked in.
11:01pm I sent my aunt a text telling her which triage room I was in so she’d know where to find us. The nurse came in and got all of my information and got me hooked up to monitors and my aunt got there.
11:28pm I text my mom to tell her that I was definitely staying. I was 5-6cm dilated and around 60% effaced.
I was moved to a labor and delivery room before midnight. We got my laptop set up and got some music going. I was still having a lot of good easy time between contractions. I talked with the nurses and asked to get a Hep-Lock in my arm so that if I ended up needing an IV at any point I’d be ready for it. I didn’t want an IV or fluids if I didn’t need it, and really didn’t want to have the restrictions of dragging around an IV pole, but I liked the idea of them having quick access if needed.
I spent the next 2 hours getting the Hep-Lock put in place and laboring.
The Hep-Lock ended up being a bit of an ordeal because my nurse hit the
vein wall on her first attempt and was afraid to try again so she
called in another nurse. That nurse tried to put it in at a less than
ideal spot because “her spot” had been the one the first nurse tried and
was unsuccessful at. So the second attempt in the not as good spot
didn’t work either. She finally got it on the third try. Thankfully,
needles don’t bother me. But they do bother Chip, so he kept leaving and
coming in to see if they were done and he’d have to leave again. The
contractions were getting fairly intense during those two hours, but I
still had time in between where I felt great. I’d walk around and talk
and joke and just wait for the next contraction and then when a
contraction would start I would lean up against the wall or lean over on
the bed with my face in a pillow and breath through it. During these
earlier contractions, I’d breath slow and long and I wanted someone
rubbing my back quickly. As they got worse later on, I switched to
short, quick, rhythmic breathing but wanted Chip and my aunt to push on
my back or rub me slowly instead of quickly.
1:45am my nurse checked me again. At that point I was at least 7cm dilated, maybe even close to 8cm (according to her). We talked and decided that she’d let my doctor know. Typically, they call the doctor at 8-9cm, but my nurse was concerned that I’d go quite quickly after my water broke and since we didn’t know when it would break, she wanted to at least give my doctor fair warning.
1:55am I updated FB: If you're up at 2am and on Facebook, then you are lucky enough to know that I am a good 7cm dilated (almost 8cm) at the hospital and getting close to meeting my sweet baby girl!! : ) Things are going great but prayers are appreciated!! : )
I was still feeling good between contractions but it was at this point that the contractions were getting really intense. I still had at least a minute or two of pain-free resting time between them though. I also sent a text to my mom at 1:58am giving her an update.
After that my nurse came back in and said that my doctor told her to call back when I was 8-9cm or when my water broke, but my nurse said she thought we’d probably see her soon. By around 2:25ish my doctor showed up. She checked me and said I was 7cm (not close to 8 according to her) and my water was “bulging”. We talked about our options at that point. I could continue to labor and see how things went or she could break my water for me. Both my doctor and the nurse told me that if she broke my water, it would get 1,000 times worse, but that they were pretty sure it would be over quickly. If I continued on, they thought it would take longer since I had the extra fluid that was keeping Brinley’s head from really pushing down as fully as they’d like (she was “floating” in the fluid). The other concern my doctor had, was that with large amounts of fluid and a floating baby, there is an increased risk of cord prolapse if your water breaks in a big gush. Cord prolapse happens when the cord comes out with the gush of water and then the baby’s head presses down on the cord cutting off the blood and oxygen flow to the baby. It still wasn’t very likely to happen, but it was more of a possibility than if the baby’s head is firmly against the cervix because in that case (which is normal) there is no way the cord can come out before the head. My doctor liked the idea of breaking my water because she’d be able to control the gush of fluid and Brinley’s head and make sure the cord was not coming out. I was starting to get tired and I liked the idea of my doctor controlling my water breaking.
2:42am My doctor broke my water. There was SO MUCH WATER. It just kept coming and coming. After a lot of it had come out, I decided to get up and use the bathroom and let the nurses put dry bedding on the bed. The contractions were coming closer together and I remember worrying about how I’d make it from the bed to the bathroom in the short time between pain. I made it there and had one or two bad contractions in the bathroom. I decided I wanted to try the birthing ball by the bed and headed over as soon as I had a short break between contractions. I made it to the birthing ball. This is when I remember doing the short shallow breaths. The contractions were so much more intense. I tried to sing along to my music some, but couldn’t. After being on the birthing ball for a few contractions I decided I needed to get back into the bed. The contractions were getting worse with each one and closer and closer together. By the time I got up on the bed, I felt like I couldn’t even move to position myself well because of the pain. It was getting overwhelming. I started to moan through these contractions and as the contraction got worse I’d get louder and possibly more high-pitched (I’m not sure…I just know the pitch and volume changed through them, I’m not sure how) and vocally I’d come back down with the contraction. It was somewhat surreal because I knew I was doing it and I HAD to do it. I almost felt like I had no control over my body or the pain. I was experiencing it and couldn’t do anything to overcome it.
I remember thinking a few things during this time. I remember telling Chip that if I thought I could move that I thought it would feel good to be in the water, but I was thinking that I knew there was no way I’d be able to go anywhere. I was barely able to move on the bed. I also said something about that it better be transition (which I had heard was the most horrible part). I was thinking as I said it that if it wasn’t transition that I had no idea how I would survive. My aunt was telling me to relax and I was feeling frustrated because there was no way I could relax. Trying to overcome the pain with the mental will-power of “trying” to relax was a completely impossible task at that point. Chip and my aunt would tell me that the contraction was ending but I wouldn’t feel any relief from the pain…the next one would already be starting. I remember asking if one was almost over and them saying yes and feeling no relief and that was when I started to worry and wondered how I’d ever keep going. At some point during the end I asked for a wet washcloth for my head.
The nurse told me to tell her if anything changed with contraction and if I felt any urge to push. I was having trouble staying connected enough through the pain to be able to tell if anything was different. I told her that I thought maybe I was feeling some urge to push on one contraction. She said to see if it happened again the next contraction and I didn’t feel it on the next one which confused me and frustrated me (in my mind…I didn’t say or do anything to show frustration). Then the next one I thought maybe I felt it again. She checked me and said I just had one little lip to go and was about ready to push. She let my doctor know who had been waiting out in the hall. During those next few contractions I know my body pushed some without me trying and I was then completely dilated.
My doctor came in and Brinley was ready to come out. My doctor had no time to get dressed for delivery. In fact, she only had one glove on as she delivered Brinley’s head. They told me to pull my legs back, which I couldn’t do through the pain. My aunt helped with one leg and the nurse with the other and they told me to push as hard as I could to get her shoulders out. I already felt like I was pushing as hard as I could, but I needed her out so I pushed more, which, like I said, didn’t seem possible.
3:35am Out she came, just 53 minutes after my doctor broke my water. They placed her on me and while I was excited to see her, my honest first reaction was just relief from the pain. I was just so glad to be done that I almost didn’t care about her (this was only for the first 20 seconds or so). They let me have her for a few minutes and my aunt cut her cord (Chip has never wanted to…it completely grosses him out). It was interesting and a little bit scary to see that her cord had a true knot in it. Thankfully it had never gotten too tight or caused any problems.
They took her over to the warmer to check her out while my doctor and I
waited for the placenta. Waiting for the placenta was much more
uncomfortable than I realized it was going to be.
Then they worked on cleaning her up and
weighing and measuring her. She weighed in at 8lbs 0.4oz (we just say
8lbs) and 20 inches long.
4:00am I had her back and was nursing her. She latched on great right away and nursed for 40 minutes straight. By around 6am they moved us to a recovery room since they had more people needing the labor rooms.
Once we were in the recovery room, Chip held Bri for a few minutes but then decided to sleep for awhile. I just admired my little Bri. I was too excited to sleep.
Chip left around 8:30am to go home and get the kids so they could come
meet their sister. I was feeling GREAT and was able to take a shower,
get dressed and blow dry and straighten my hair....just 6 hours after
having her : ) The kids got there a little after 10 and LOVED meeting
their sister. We got a GREAT first family photo, too!
Immediately after having her, I decided I would NEVER EVER do THAT ever again. I thought at the time it was one of the dumbest things I've ever done (a natural birth...no epidural). Of course now, 6 weeks later, my memory is already blurred and the horrific pain is far enough behind me and I can now say that I'm sure I'll probably do it again.
As my pregnancy with Brinley unfolded, it followed the pattern I’d come to expect. At 32 weeks, I was measuring correctly. By 34.5 weeks I was measuring closer to 37 weeks and my doctor ordered the growth ultrasound. I went for the ultrasound a week later, when I was 35 weeks 4 days pregnant with Bri and she was estimated to be 7lbs 5oz. The other thing causing me to measure on the large side was excessive amounts of amniotic fluid. The fluid surrounding Brinley was about twice the “normal” amount of fluid.
Between Brinley’s size and the extra fluid, I was getting very uncomfortable and taking care of the house and kids was getting harder. Thankfully, I was still sleeping well at night and since I was carrying Brinley high, I only was waking up once in the night to use the bathroom at the most…sometimes I was able to sleep through without using the bathroom.
By my 36 week (I was 36 weeks 5 days) appointment which was on Thursday March 8th, my doctor had decided that she wanted to start non-stress tests twice a week starting the next week. She wanted me to come on Mondays and Thursdays. I made my appointment for Monday, March 12th. She told me that if I wanted her to strip my membranes that day, she would do that for me, and that she would like to try to get things going.
Over the weekend, we had to decide if I would have my doctor strip my membranes. I desperately WANTED Brinley OUT, but there were some things that made the decision somewhat hard. The biggest thing was Chip’s work schedule. On Monday and Tuesday, March 12th and 13th most of the managers and shift leads that work with Chip were out of town. I also had a dinner planned with two of my friends on the evening of March 12th. I didn’t want to miss it : ) But I really wanted her out. Chip decided that work would be ok without him on Monday and Tuesday if I were to go into labor and I decided that I would just have the doctor go ahead and strip me and we’d see what happened. I was trying not to get my hopes up too much and remember that “each pregnancy/labor/delivery can be different”.
 | ||||||
| Here I am on Saturday, March 10th...about 48 hours before going into labor. |
Monday, March 12th
8:30am Chip left for work and I got ready for my appointment.
10:15am His mom came over to watch the kids and my Aunt Ruth who played the part of my “doula” came over to take me to my appointment.
11:00am We got to my appointment and waited for awhile until the machine was available for the non-stress test. I got hooked up and they monitored Brinley for about 20 minutes. She looked great. We moved into an exam room and my doctor checked me. My cervix was harder to reach than previous weeks and I was still only around 30% effaced and 2-3cm dilated. My doctor stripped my membranes and said she’d come back in around 10 minutes to do them one more time, which she did.
12:30pm We left the office and my aunt dropped me off at home. I asked my mother-in-law if she would come back over later that night when I got home from dinner so that Chip and I could go for a walk. I felt no different than before the appointment and was preparing myself mentally that I’d probably still be pregnant and would be going to my next appointment that Thursday. I was excited that I had the dinner plans with friends because it gave me something exciting to look forward to since nothing seemed to be happening baby-wise.
Around late afternoon, I had a few very sporadic, spread out contractions which weren’t really any different than other contractions I’d been having. I sent text messages to my friends that dinner was still on, telling one of them that it would be perfect if we could go out to dinner and then I could go into labor after that, but I wasn’t planning on it.
6:30pm I called my mom on the way to dinner. I told her that I’d had some contractions but nothing significant and we talked about how I had been so discouraged the whole day that I had my membranes stripped with Ryken too, thinking nothing would happen. Remembering that gave me a little bit of hope that something may still happen, but I was still trying to mentally prepare myself to be pregnant for awhile longer.
6:45pm I got to Pei Wei and was walking from my car to the restaurant and had a contraction that was a little bit stronger and lasted a little bit longer, but still nothing that made me very excited. At this point, I must have started having contractions every 15-20 minutes that were getting much more noticeable. I remember having one while I was outside sitting on a bench talking to my friend Jamie waiting for Melissa to get there. I had 2 more while we waited in the long line. I had another one or two while we ate and another one when we walked down to Paradise Bakery to get cookies. By that point, I was a little bit more excited, especially since Chip’s mom was coming so we could go for a walk. I was starting to get hopeful that the walk might really get things going.
8:50pm I got home and Chip’s mom was there, so we headed out on a walk around the neighborhood. Almost right away, the contractions started coming regularly…around every 3 minutes. They were lasting around 35-45 seconds. As we walked further some of them got stronger and lasted longer, others stayed shorter. They were anywhere from 2 minutes apart lasting a full minute to 4 minutes apart lasting 40 seconds. We had been walking for around 15-20 minutes and decided to head back so I could use the bathroom. I also wanted to rest for awhile to see if the contractions stayed consistent or went away.
9:12pm On our way back, I called my mom and told her that things were starting to look pretty promising for that night. She decided she’d still wait until morning to drive up.
9:25pm We got back from our walk and I went to the bathroom and was having some bloody show.
9:30pm I called my aunt to tell her what was going on. I decided I’d rest for awhile and then go for another walk and I would call her if/when we decided to go to the hospital based on how things were going. Chip decided to take a shower and was updating his MP3 player. As I sat around, contractions continued to come, although a little bit further apart, maybe every 5-6 minutes. Whenever I was up, they were stronger and closer, but when I sat down they stayed strong enough that I knew things were still happening.
9:40pm I called my sister-in-law, Liz, to let her know what was going on. Chip’s dad dropped some stuff off for Chip’s mom since it was looking like she’d be staying over night with the kids and we finished packing up for the hospital.
10:30pm We decided that we’d put our bags in the car and take another walk. With my labor with Ryken and my labor with the twins, I had to walk A LOT at the hospital. I wanted to walk outside in the nice weather as long as possible.
We put everything in the car and started out on our second walk. We got about 50ft from our condo complex when I told Chip we better turn around and just go to the hospital. The contractions were getting significantly stronger and I didn’t want to get into the neighborhood and not be able to walk back.
10:42pm I called Aunt Ruth to tell her we were in the car headed to the hospital and that she could come whenever she wanted to. I got to labor and delivery and checked in.
11:01pm I sent my aunt a text telling her which triage room I was in so she’d know where to find us. The nurse came in and got all of my information and got me hooked up to monitors and my aunt got there.
11:28pm I text my mom to tell her that I was definitely staying. I was 5-6cm dilated and around 60% effaced.
I was moved to a labor and delivery room before midnight. We got my laptop set up and got some music going. I was still having a lot of good easy time between contractions. I talked with the nurses and asked to get a Hep-Lock in my arm so that if I ended up needing an IV at any point I’d be ready for it. I didn’t want an IV or fluids if I didn’t need it, and really didn’t want to have the restrictions of dragging around an IV pole, but I liked the idea of them having quick access if needed.
 |
| Apparently at this point the pain, while unpleasant, was still something I could work through easily. |
 |
| Having fun between contractions. |
 |
| Feeling good. |
1:45am my nurse checked me again. At that point I was at least 7cm dilated, maybe even close to 8cm (according to her). We talked and decided that she’d let my doctor know. Typically, they call the doctor at 8-9cm, but my nurse was concerned that I’d go quite quickly after my water broke and since we didn’t know when it would break, she wanted to at least give my doctor fair warning.
1:55am I updated FB: If you're up at 2am and on Facebook, then you are lucky enough to know that I am a good 7cm dilated (almost 8cm) at the hospital and getting close to meeting my sweet baby girl!! : ) Things are going great but prayers are appreciated!! : )
I was still feeling good between contractions but it was at this point that the contractions were getting really intense. I still had at least a minute or two of pain-free resting time between them though. I also sent a text to my mom at 1:58am giving her an update.
 |
| Still smiling during pain-free times : ) |
 |
| Having to work harder through the pain. |
 | ||
| Just workin' it out. |
After that my nurse came back in and said that my doctor told her to call back when I was 8-9cm or when my water broke, but my nurse said she thought we’d probably see her soon. By around 2:25ish my doctor showed up. She checked me and said I was 7cm (not close to 8 according to her) and my water was “bulging”. We talked about our options at that point. I could continue to labor and see how things went or she could break my water for me. Both my doctor and the nurse told me that if she broke my water, it would get 1,000 times worse, but that they were pretty sure it would be over quickly. If I continued on, they thought it would take longer since I had the extra fluid that was keeping Brinley’s head from really pushing down as fully as they’d like (she was “floating” in the fluid). The other concern my doctor had, was that with large amounts of fluid and a floating baby, there is an increased risk of cord prolapse if your water breaks in a big gush. Cord prolapse happens when the cord comes out with the gush of water and then the baby’s head presses down on the cord cutting off the blood and oxygen flow to the baby. It still wasn’t very likely to happen, but it was more of a possibility than if the baby’s head is firmly against the cervix because in that case (which is normal) there is no way the cord can come out before the head. My doctor liked the idea of breaking my water because she’d be able to control the gush of fluid and Brinley’s head and make sure the cord was not coming out. I was starting to get tired and I liked the idea of my doctor controlling my water breaking.
2:42am My doctor broke my water. There was SO MUCH WATER. It just kept coming and coming. After a lot of it had come out, I decided to get up and use the bathroom and let the nurses put dry bedding on the bed. The contractions were coming closer together and I remember worrying about how I’d make it from the bed to the bathroom in the short time between pain. I made it there and had one or two bad contractions in the bathroom. I decided I wanted to try the birthing ball by the bed and headed over as soon as I had a short break between contractions. I made it to the birthing ball. This is when I remember doing the short shallow breaths. The contractions were so much more intense. I tried to sing along to my music some, but couldn’t. After being on the birthing ball for a few contractions I decided I needed to get back into the bed. The contractions were getting worse with each one and closer and closer together. By the time I got up on the bed, I felt like I couldn’t even move to position myself well because of the pain. It was getting overwhelming. I started to moan through these contractions and as the contraction got worse I’d get louder and possibly more high-pitched (I’m not sure…I just know the pitch and volume changed through them, I’m not sure how) and vocally I’d come back down with the contraction. It was somewhat surreal because I knew I was doing it and I HAD to do it. I almost felt like I had no control over my body or the pain. I was experiencing it and couldn’t do anything to overcome it.
 | ||
| This picture was taken at 3:08am. Bri was born 27 minutes later. This was when the pain was really starting to take over. |
The nurse told me to tell her if anything changed with contraction and if I felt any urge to push. I was having trouble staying connected enough through the pain to be able to tell if anything was different. I told her that I thought maybe I was feeling some urge to push on one contraction. She said to see if it happened again the next contraction and I didn’t feel it on the next one which confused me and frustrated me (in my mind…I didn’t say or do anything to show frustration). Then the next one I thought maybe I felt it again. She checked me and said I just had one little lip to go and was about ready to push. She let my doctor know who had been waiting out in the hall. During those next few contractions I know my body pushed some without me trying and I was then completely dilated.
My doctor came in and Brinley was ready to come out. My doctor had no time to get dressed for delivery. In fact, she only had one glove on as she delivered Brinley’s head. They told me to pull my legs back, which I couldn’t do through the pain. My aunt helped with one leg and the nurse with the other and they told me to push as hard as I could to get her shoulders out. I already felt like I was pushing as hard as I could, but I needed her out so I pushed more, which, like I said, didn’t seem possible.
3:35am Out she came, just 53 minutes after my doctor broke my water. They placed her on me and while I was excited to see her, my honest first reaction was just relief from the pain. I was just so glad to be done that I almost didn’t care about her (this was only for the first 20 seconds or so). They let me have her for a few minutes and my aunt cut her cord (Chip has never wanted to…it completely grosses him out). It was interesting and a little bit scary to see that her cord had a true knot in it. Thankfully it had never gotten too tight or caused any problems.
 |
| She's out. And gooey! |
 |
| SO happy it's over. I look a little crazy. |
 |
| Crazy knot in her cord. |
 |
| Admiring my goo-ball that I worked so hard for. ♥ |
 |
| Getting her covered up. |
 |
| Telling her to cry. (Then my doctor reminded me she was ok since her cord wasn't cut yet) |
 |
| Good little lungs. |
 |
| I love that Chip was with her across the room ♥ |
 |
| Checking her out. |
 |
| More goober-baby |
 |
| Chubby cheeks. |
As soon as the
placenta was delivered they brought her back to me and we got a picture with my doctor.
 |
| I love love love my doctor. |
 |
| So upset. |
 |
| Thank you for coming out early, Bri. |
 |
| Teeny Toes. |
Once we were in the recovery room, Chip held Bri for a few minutes but then decided to sleep for awhile. I just admired my little Bri. I was too excited to sleep.
 |
| 6:25am. Almost 3 hours old with her Daddy. |
 |
| I was SO happy to have her OUT of my belly and IN my arms! |
 | |
| All 7 of us! : ) Casey, Kenzie, Brinely, Me, Emery, Chip, Ryken |
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Saturday, October 8, 2011
It's been WAY. TOO. LONG
So. I haven't updated in forever. Months. I debated whether I should even update now. I WISH I would start writing regularly. That would be awesome. But I know I won't. Maybe someday.
But I couldn't log into my blog without at least making note of the amazing news of baby #5. This isn't new news.....I'm 15 weeks pregnant today.
This poor baby. We are BEYOND excited about adding this little one to our family, but unfortunately this baby doesn't get as much "blog-time" as the other kids have gotten. So I needed to at least make Baby 5's presence known in blog-world.
We find out gender in 3 1/2 weeks : ) I'll try to update again then. Maybe. Maybe not.
But I couldn't log into my blog without at least making note of the amazing news of baby #5. This isn't new news.....I'm 15 weeks pregnant today.
This poor baby. We are BEYOND excited about adding this little one to our family, but unfortunately this baby doesn't get as much "blog-time" as the other kids have gotten. So I needed to at least make Baby 5's presence known in blog-world.
We find out gender in 3 1/2 weeks : ) I'll try to update again then. Maybe. Maybe not.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Important reminders.
SO, as usual, it's been awhile. Too long.
I've wanted to sit down and write several times, but there are always other things higher on the priority list....even now, there are so many things that need to be done, but I just needed to get my thoughts down tonight...I need to record the things that God is reminding me tonight, so that I can come back and remember these things.
Current status:
*Kenzie: She has had a fever for 4 full days + runny nose. Thankfully only 1 really sick/pukey day.
*Ryken: So far, so good.
*Casey: Fever on and off last week....fussy....now congested/snotty/coughing. Plus as a new walker/climber he is getting into EVERYTHING.
*Emery: Ditto Casey....plus more fever today. Getting in EVERYTHING x2.
ADD TO THAT:
*At 12 1/2 months the boys STILL haven't slept through the night.
*NEVER-ENDING MOUNDS of housework...I never even get close to being caught up. 4 small children are able to rip everything apart MUCH faster than I can put it back together.
*Date night tomorrow night: canceled due to sick babysitters & sick kids. BUM-MER.
There is more I'm sure....I'm pretty much on the verge of a giant pity party. But that's where this blog comes in.....right when I'm about to start sulking and being miserable, God is being faithful. He is reminding me that my circumstances aren't nearly as bad as I want to believe. Here are how the thoughts in my head are working:
*Ahh...poor me with all the sick kids...BUT this sickness WILL go away. This sickness isn't THAT bad. My mind actually wanders to the sick kids in other countries....like babies battling Malaria in Ethiopia. The sickness my babies face doesn't even compare. I don't have any room to complain. I'm not fearing for their lives. I KNOW it will get better, sooner than later, and I will probably not even really remember this week in a few months.
*Canceled date night: What about the MILLIONS of people who never get a "date night" at all. I think in a way, it is reminding me that I don't NEED to go out on dates. I think in a way I've been lied to for awhile. I feel like I hear everywhere that it is SO important to keep "going out" and keep "dating" to keep your marriage strong. I'm starting to rethink things. I won't let "going out" be something I NEED. It is nice. It is fine. But we don't NEED it. And the disappointment when it doesn't happen needs to be something I get over FAST. There are people all over this world who have SO much less than I have and yet I want to sit and sulk and grumble and complain that I won't get to leave my home for a couple of hours. I am thankful for my family. I am thankful that I get to take care of my precious babies...even if it means NEVER getting a break. I am thankful for my home and the numerous COMFORTS & LUXURIES of my home.
I need to remember these things. I need to be thankful. The circumstances have been set before me....I can choose how I will respond. Everything in my flesh is ready to get the pity-party underway....but thankfully, I have Jesus and I have the Holy Spirit in my heart....and He is so much bigger, so much more.
So tonight, not by my own strength, but through the strength of the One who satisfies, I will not only CANCEL the pity party in my heart....I will be throwing a big CELEBRATION instead, praising and thanking my Lord and my God.
I've wanted to sit down and write several times, but there are always other things higher on the priority list....even now, there are so many things that need to be done, but I just needed to get my thoughts down tonight...I need to record the things that God is reminding me tonight, so that I can come back and remember these things.
Current status:
*Kenzie: She has had a fever for 4 full days + runny nose. Thankfully only 1 really sick/pukey day.
*Ryken: So far, so good.
*Casey: Fever on and off last week....fussy....now congested/snotty/coughing. Plus as a new walker/climber he is getting into EVERYTHING.
*Emery: Ditto Casey....plus more fever today. Getting in EVERYTHING x2.
ADD TO THAT:
*At 12 1/2 months the boys STILL haven't slept through the night.
*NEVER-ENDING MOUNDS of housework...I never even get close to being caught up. 4 small children are able to rip everything apart MUCH faster than I can put it back together.
*Date night tomorrow night: canceled due to sick babysitters & sick kids. BUM-MER.
There is more I'm sure....I'm pretty much on the verge of a giant pity party. But that's where this blog comes in.....right when I'm about to start sulking and being miserable, God is being faithful. He is reminding me that my circumstances aren't nearly as bad as I want to believe. Here are how the thoughts in my head are working:
*Ahh...poor me with all the sick kids...BUT this sickness WILL go away. This sickness isn't THAT bad. My mind actually wanders to the sick kids in other countries....like babies battling Malaria in Ethiopia. The sickness my babies face doesn't even compare. I don't have any room to complain. I'm not fearing for their lives. I KNOW it will get better, sooner than later, and I will probably not even really remember this week in a few months.
*Canceled date night: What about the MILLIONS of people who never get a "date night" at all. I think in a way, it is reminding me that I don't NEED to go out on dates. I think in a way I've been lied to for awhile. I feel like I hear everywhere that it is SO important to keep "going out" and keep "dating" to keep your marriage strong. I'm starting to rethink things. I won't let "going out" be something I NEED. It is nice. It is fine. But we don't NEED it. And the disappointment when it doesn't happen needs to be something I get over FAST. There are people all over this world who have SO much less than I have and yet I want to sit and sulk and grumble and complain that I won't get to leave my home for a couple of hours. I am thankful for my family. I am thankful that I get to take care of my precious babies...even if it means NEVER getting a break. I am thankful for my home and the numerous COMFORTS & LUXURIES of my home.
I need to remember these things. I need to be thankful. The circumstances have been set before me....I can choose how I will respond. Everything in my flesh is ready to get the pity-party underway....but thankfully, I have Jesus and I have the Holy Spirit in my heart....and He is so much bigger, so much more.
So tonight, not by my own strength, but through the strength of the One who satisfies, I will not only CANCEL the pity party in my heart....I will be throwing a big CELEBRATION instead, praising and thanking my Lord and my God.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Better late than never....
So.
Here I am.
FINALLY.
My plan of setting a goal failed, apparently. It probably wasn't the smartest thing on my part to have the "end date" of the goal be the night before I left on a week long, whirlwind trip around the midwest with 7 month old twins....I definitely THOUGHT about blogging in those last days of August. My "goal" was in my mind. But I was scrambling trying to get things ready to go and have things ready for Chip and the kids here at home. So, the blog, once again, got pushed to the bottom of the list....and I never got all the way through the list (who ever does?)
But I'm here now.
So, let's get started. I think I'm just going to work my way through the requests. We'll see what happens?! Oh. And there will be one post about breastfeeding...if you're friends with me on Facebook then there is a chance you've already read it, but since I took so much time thinking it through and writing it out, I'd like to post it here too : )
So..I guess I will start with the first "request"....updates about the kiddos. It's been awhile. Always a good thing to do, right?
Makenzie Rose - almost 3 1/2 years old (her 1/2 birthday is in October)
What a wonderful little girl I have been blessed with. She is SO independent...too much so, sometimes. But she is such a wonderful helper. She cares about her whole family so much, especially her brothers. She is now FULLY potty-trained. She has been daytime potty-trained for a long time, but it was finally a few months ago that we successfully mastered night-time. She has NEVER had a nighttime accident...she's done SO well. Kenzie LOVES to go to the "craft store" (Michael's, JoAnn's, etc) and buy things to paint. This is activity that the kids get to do with daddy and they both really enjoy it. Lately, Kenzie has really gotten into pretending to be other people. This week, she has gone back and forth between being Sally from the Cat in the Hat and being "Aunt" Jennifer (a good family friend). If she is Sally, then naturally, Ryken is Nick and Chip is Cat in the Hat. I either get to be the fish or the mother. Very special. If she is "Aunt" Jennifer, it means she is taking care of her baby....baby Sophia. And Ryken, naturally, is "Uncle" Tim. Luckily for Kenzie, Ryken thinks the world of his big sister and is pretty much always willing to "be" whoever she tells him he has to be. Her new "Kenzie-ism" is saying "Be-um-cause". I think it is hilarious that she breaks up the word because with "um" in the middle and she does it ALL of the time. She is already making me more prayerful about our decision to at least start out homeschooling her. She talks about school all of the time and notices schools when we drive by them. She is so outgoing and already has it in her head that "school" is the place to be. I am praying that we will know what is perfect for our little girl. I'm hoping to start some preschool worksheets with her soon....have a little "school time". She loves to learn and I am hoping it will be fun for both of us.
Ryken Chip- just over 2 (his birthday was in July)
Ryken is my little peanut of a boy : ) At his 2 year check up he was 24 1/2 lbs and 32.5in, 11th percentile and 9th percentile respectively. He is a very verbal child, talking in complete sentences and repeating MUCH more than Kenzie did at this age. Kenzie talked well early on, but I think her example has made Ryken even more verbal from early on. He learns things easily and mastered playing on the computer before he turned 2. He knows his colors, animals, ABCs and numbers. He can sing several songs...mostly from their Bible songs CD. His favorite movie is Cars and he almost always has one of the Cars characters in his hand. The past few days he has been attached to the green car- Chick Hicks. He looks for it the second he wakes up (usually in his bed since he HAS to sleep with it too) and he takes it everywhere with him. He is such a sweet boy and LOVES his babies. He is always quick to make sure that the babies and I are greeted with hugs and kisses each morning when we wake up and come out to the living room. Hmmm...what else? He bit his tongue VERY badly 2 days ago...his top 4 middle teeth all went into the middle of his tongue leaving a very deep gash. He has been AMAZING about it though. The first night we gave him ibuprofen before bed. Last night we didn't give him anything and he was making whining/crying out noises from his sleep in the middle of the night, so we gave him some then. But otherwise, he has been such a little trooper. It HAS to hurt and he hasn't been eating quite as much. But he hasn't complained about it at all! Ryken is not interested AT ALL in potty training yet, although I am pretty sure he is completely aware of his bodily functions and is also a great communicator. He just doesn't WANT to do it. At all. So we'll wait. We waited for Kenzie to be interested and lead the way and it totally paid off. So we're going to do the same with Ryken.
The Twins
I never know if I should group them together or not, but it just seems to make sense. Yes, they are two individuals. And I will talk about their own individual quirks. But they also just go together. But it has been fun to see their differences emerge more and more the older they get. They are 7 1/2 months old now. They both started scootching around at about 6 months old and are now full-on crawling. They both started pulling up on things a couple weeks ago and are now standing around furniture and in their cribs several times each day. Casey made this a regular habit a few days before Emery did. They are both good eaters. They eat baby food at breakfast, lunch, and dinner. They still nurse 5-6 times a day (and night). They are both happy boys. BUT...if I told you about my baby who blows raspberries, I'd be talking about Emery. I have NEVER seen (or heard) Casey blow raspberries. Emery does it daily, especially when he has a mouthful of babyfood. However, if I told you about my baby who likes to pound on things and bang his toys on things, I would be talking about Casey. This activity is one of "his things". The boys got their bottom teeth within days of each other....it went Casey: bottom left, Emery: bottom left, Emery: bottom right, Casey: bottom right. But then, Casey got his top left tooth. Right on his 7 month birthday. But now, 2 weeks later, Emery STILL shows no sign of either top tooth popping through. So that's another difference right now...3 teeth vs 2 teeth. Emery is my spit-up baby. 90% of the spit-up we deal with comes from Emers. Casey is my biter-baby. If the babies are nursing and one bites, 90% of the time is is Cas-a-roo. There is so much that is the same about them...but little by little, they are revealing their individuality to us : ) Hmm...so I think that's about it on the little boys.
So, that's somewhat of an update....I'll be back again sometime...who knows when! Hoping sooner than later : )
Here I am.
FINALLY.
My plan of setting a goal failed, apparently. It probably wasn't the smartest thing on my part to have the "end date" of the goal be the night before I left on a week long, whirlwind trip around the midwest with 7 month old twins....I definitely THOUGHT about blogging in those last days of August. My "goal" was in my mind. But I was scrambling trying to get things ready to go and have things ready for Chip and the kids here at home. So, the blog, once again, got pushed to the bottom of the list....and I never got all the way through the list (who ever does?)
But I'm here now.
So, let's get started. I think I'm just going to work my way through the requests. We'll see what happens?! Oh. And there will be one post about breastfeeding...if you're friends with me on Facebook then there is a chance you've already read it, but since I took so much time thinking it through and writing it out, I'd like to post it here too : )
So..I guess I will start with the first "request"....updates about the kiddos. It's been awhile. Always a good thing to do, right?
Makenzie Rose - almost 3 1/2 years old (her 1/2 birthday is in October)
What a wonderful little girl I have been blessed with. She is SO independent...too much so, sometimes. But she is such a wonderful helper. She cares about her whole family so much, especially her brothers. She is now FULLY potty-trained. She has been daytime potty-trained for a long time, but it was finally a few months ago that we successfully mastered night-time. She has NEVER had a nighttime accident...she's done SO well. Kenzie LOVES to go to the "craft store" (Michael's, JoAnn's, etc) and buy things to paint. This is activity that the kids get to do with daddy and they both really enjoy it. Lately, Kenzie has really gotten into pretending to be other people. This week, she has gone back and forth between being Sally from the Cat in the Hat and being "Aunt" Jennifer (a good family friend). If she is Sally, then naturally, Ryken is Nick and Chip is Cat in the Hat. I either get to be the fish or the mother. Very special. If she is "Aunt" Jennifer, it means she is taking care of her baby....baby Sophia. And Ryken, naturally, is "Uncle" Tim. Luckily for Kenzie, Ryken thinks the world of his big sister and is pretty much always willing to "be" whoever she tells him he has to be. Her new "Kenzie-ism" is saying "Be-um-cause". I think it is hilarious that she breaks up the word because with "um" in the middle and she does it ALL of the time. She is already making me more prayerful about our decision to at least start out homeschooling her. She talks about school all of the time and notices schools when we drive by them. She is so outgoing and already has it in her head that "school" is the place to be. I am praying that we will know what is perfect for our little girl. I'm hoping to start some preschool worksheets with her soon....have a little "school time". She loves to learn and I am hoping it will be fun for both of us.
Ryken Chip- just over 2 (his birthday was in July)
Ryken is my little peanut of a boy : ) At his 2 year check up he was 24 1/2 lbs and 32.5in, 11th percentile and 9th percentile respectively. He is a very verbal child, talking in complete sentences and repeating MUCH more than Kenzie did at this age. Kenzie talked well early on, but I think her example has made Ryken even more verbal from early on. He learns things easily and mastered playing on the computer before he turned 2. He knows his colors, animals, ABCs and numbers. He can sing several songs...mostly from their Bible songs CD. His favorite movie is Cars and he almost always has one of the Cars characters in his hand. The past few days he has been attached to the green car- Chick Hicks. He looks for it the second he wakes up (usually in his bed since he HAS to sleep with it too) and he takes it everywhere with him. He is such a sweet boy and LOVES his babies. He is always quick to make sure that the babies and I are greeted with hugs and kisses each morning when we wake up and come out to the living room. Hmmm...what else? He bit his tongue VERY badly 2 days ago...his top 4 middle teeth all went into the middle of his tongue leaving a very deep gash. He has been AMAZING about it though. The first night we gave him ibuprofen before bed. Last night we didn't give him anything and he was making whining/crying out noises from his sleep in the middle of the night, so we gave him some then. But otherwise, he has been such a little trooper. It HAS to hurt and he hasn't been eating quite as much. But he hasn't complained about it at all! Ryken is not interested AT ALL in potty training yet, although I am pretty sure he is completely aware of his bodily functions and is also a great communicator. He just doesn't WANT to do it. At all. So we'll wait. We waited for Kenzie to be interested and lead the way and it totally paid off. So we're going to do the same with Ryken.
The Twins
I never know if I should group them together or not, but it just seems to make sense. Yes, they are two individuals. And I will talk about their own individual quirks. But they also just go together. But it has been fun to see their differences emerge more and more the older they get. They are 7 1/2 months old now. They both started scootching around at about 6 months old and are now full-on crawling. They both started pulling up on things a couple weeks ago and are now standing around furniture and in their cribs several times each day. Casey made this a regular habit a few days before Emery did. They are both good eaters. They eat baby food at breakfast, lunch, and dinner. They still nurse 5-6 times a day (and night). They are both happy boys. BUT...if I told you about my baby who blows raspberries, I'd be talking about Emery. I have NEVER seen (or heard) Casey blow raspberries. Emery does it daily, especially when he has a mouthful of babyfood. However, if I told you about my baby who likes to pound on things and bang his toys on things, I would be talking about Casey. This activity is one of "his things". The boys got their bottom teeth within days of each other....it went Casey: bottom left, Emery: bottom left, Emery: bottom right, Casey: bottom right. But then, Casey got his top left tooth. Right on his 7 month birthday. But now, 2 weeks later, Emery STILL shows no sign of either top tooth popping through. So that's another difference right now...3 teeth vs 2 teeth. Emery is my spit-up baby. 90% of the spit-up we deal with comes from Emers. Casey is my biter-baby. If the babies are nursing and one bites, 90% of the time is is Cas-a-roo. There is so much that is the same about them...but little by little, they are revealing their individuality to us : ) Hmm...so I think that's about it on the little boys.
So, that's somewhat of an update....I'll be back again sometime...who knows when! Hoping sooner than later : )
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Eenie-Meenie-Miney-Moe
What do I write about first.
I know I've mentioned it before......the way I blog in my head and then never sit down and get the words OUT of my head. When this happens, I start to store up the ideas. As the ideas build up, it gets more and more tiring to think about actually sitting down and blogging.....because then I have to CHOOSE which thing to write about. I know that I will never have time to sit down and write out ALL my blogs at once. So that means I have to PICK something. And I am no good at that. So usually I think about it for awhile, and then decide I'll figure it out later. In the meantime, I write a few more blogs in my head.....just making the problem worse. Luckily...lately my brain has been so fried, that eventually I start to forget some of the ideas, which clears things out a little...but not enough to make the decision-making process easy.
So.....some things I'd LIKE to blog about are:
*Updates on my wee-ones
*Body Image...post twins...or kids...or just as a female in general??
*Running races....literally and figuratively
*Finding balance in life
*Making LOTS o' baby food for 2 hungry boys
*Cake-making
AND more.
I doubt that THIS blog entry will help...but I thought that MAYBE if I stopped AVOIDING my blog every time I thought about blogging and actually sat down and wrote SOMETHING, it would motivate me to sit down and write more often (haha. right. I know, I'm laughing at that too...) I know I can't write about ALL of these things in one sitting....but if I write MORE OFTEN then maybe I can get them all out EVENTUALLY.
Hmmmm...so here is an idea....I doubt anyone even checks this regularly since I am oh-so wonderful about updating (sorry!) BUT if you DO happen to read this and one of the above-mentioned topics catches your eye and you'd like me to hurry up and write about it, then comment. Or if you have something else you want me to write about, comment about that too (because what I REALLY need are MORE ideas for blog posts...right??)
My goal is: By the end of August (11:59pm on August 31st or HOPEFULLY earlier) to have come BACK and written about SOMETHING.
I know I've mentioned it before......the way I blog in my head and then never sit down and get the words OUT of my head. When this happens, I start to store up the ideas. As the ideas build up, it gets more and more tiring to think about actually sitting down and blogging.....because then I have to CHOOSE which thing to write about. I know that I will never have time to sit down and write out ALL my blogs at once. So that means I have to PICK something. And I am no good at that. So usually I think about it for awhile, and then decide I'll figure it out later. In the meantime, I write a few more blogs in my head.....just making the problem worse. Luckily...lately my brain has been so fried, that eventually I start to forget some of the ideas, which clears things out a little...but not enough to make the decision-making process easy.
So.....some things I'd LIKE to blog about are:
*Updates on my wee-ones
*Body Image...post twins...or kids...or just as a female in general??
*Running races....literally and figuratively
*Finding balance in life
*Making LOTS o' baby food for 2 hungry boys
*Cake-making
AND more.
I doubt that THIS blog entry will help...but I thought that MAYBE if I stopped AVOIDING my blog every time I thought about blogging and actually sat down and wrote SOMETHING, it would motivate me to sit down and write more often (haha. right. I know, I'm laughing at that too...) I know I can't write about ALL of these things in one sitting....but if I write MORE OFTEN then maybe I can get them all out EVENTUALLY.
Hmmmm...so here is an idea....I doubt anyone even checks this regularly since I am oh-so wonderful about updating (sorry!) BUT if you DO happen to read this and one of the above-mentioned topics catches your eye and you'd like me to hurry up and write about it, then comment. Or if you have something else you want me to write about, comment about that too (because what I REALLY need are MORE ideas for blog posts...right??)
My goal is: By the end of August (11:59pm on August 31st or HOPEFULLY earlier) to have come BACK and written about SOMETHING.
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